The truth is, we are living in a world that no longer believes that all things are possible…. (Mark 9:23) thus we are often times surprised when something out of the ordinary happens for us. We are in the era where we depend on our own capabilities, intelligence, strength, creativity and wherewithal. We’re often surprised because reality doesn’t always match our expectations. Surprise is a psychological and emotional response to something unexpected—something that violates our mental predictions about how things should go. As a people, we no longer expect the creator to take care of the created. “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  (Jeremiah 29:11) 
 Believing in the Lord eliminates surprises because there is always the level of expectation that when our request is made, He hears and answers.

We constantly predict what will happen next based on experience, knowledge, and context. When something breaks that pattern—positively or negatively—we’re surprised. Example: You expect your friend to be late (as usual), but they show up early. Surprise! Sometimes we are surprised negatively because what was requested didn’t show up in the expected package. This brings on a level of ingratitude because expectations were not met. The plan of God for each of our life is vast. We can’t even fathom it therefore having complete trust in God creates the space for God to blow our minds.

We assume stability in a changing world.

We tend to believe that things will stay as they are. But the world is dynamic, plans shift, seasons change. This contrast creates surprise. Example: You thought your job was secure, but there’s a sudden round of layoffs. Did it mean God did not hear your prayer? Not at all. Isaiah 55:8-9 tells us, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.” This reminds us that God’s plans may look surprising or even confusing from a human point of view. That job lay off was a surprise to you but there is a better one being prepared.

Finally, God delights in reversing expectations. The Bible repeatedly shows God lifting the humble and bringing down the proud, turning things upside down. Surprise! Surprise!

• 1 Samuel 2:7–8 (ESV) “The Lord makes poor and makes rich; he brings low and he exalts.”
• Luke 1:52–53 (ESV) “He has brought down the mighty from their thrones and exalted those of humble estate.”

My encouragement this week, is for us to yield to the plan of God. Be anxious for nothing. God always wants to do more than we can think or even imagine. Don’t allow the element of surprise to usher in doubt and or unbelief but rather, know that God in His Sovereignty will do what’s best for us, after all He loves us unconditionally.

More Grace!

This is the act of understanding yourself, often due to fear, low self esteem, perfectionism or unresolved inner conflict. CAN YOU RELATE? It is when someone deliberately or unconsciously hinders their own success, progress, or well-being through behaviours, thoughts, or actions that are counter productive.

I was sitting and admiring my daughter sleep when it hits me like a ton of bricks (loudly and painstakingly) how i have been in my own way of success for many years. I have always been afraid of change and tend to people please. Therefore making a decision without the influence and buy-in of someone else was a challenge. Taking that leap of faith and believing that God will order my steps have been formidable. I yearn for something new different but most times when the opportunity presents itself, fear, ‘i can’t and so many emotions come flooding down until either i lose interest or the opportunity passes.

Proverbs 21:25-26 tells us that the desire of a sluggard/lazy man kills him, for his hands refuse to labor. He covets greedily all day long But the righteous gives and does not spare. The scripture highlights the desire of a person not someone else, it was coming from within himself. Sometimes our desire for self can be so warped thus blocking God from doing what He promised. How do we Self Sabotage:

1. Procrastination – delaying important tasks even when there is a deadline. We keep putting things off for tomorrow.
2. Negative Self Talk – constantly telling ourselves that we are not good enough.
3. Perfectionism – setting unrealistic goals, then quitting when they are not met.
4. Avoidance – avoiding opportunities out of fear of failure or rejection.
5. Substance abuse or unhealthy habits – coping with stress in destructive ways.
6. Starting conflicts or pushing people away – when things are going good, you pull it apart before it collapses (all in the mind).

Mark 7:20-23 talks about the evil found within a man that ultimately defiles him. CAN YOU IDENTIFY?

Here are a few pointers of why we Self-Sabotage:

1. Fear – i still struggle sometimes with what if i fail or even succeed. Can i maintain maintain the success?
2. Low self worth – many people, even christians are affected by this. The scripture tells us that our identity is found in Jesus Christ (John 1:12; 2 Corinthians 5:17). We question, do i deserve it?
3. Imposter Syndrome – will people find out i’m not the best at what i am doing?
4. Not wanting to leave what is comfortable – we prefer to stay in dysfunction and experience pain than moving into something new and different.

How do we overcome:

1. Become Self-aware – pay attention to patterns and triggers.
2. Challenge your negative beliefs. Put them against truth (the Word of God) and ask the question (where did this belief come from? Was it from a bad or triumphant experience?
3. Set REAL goals – cheer for yourself at each stage.
4. Do not compare yourself – Be kind to YOU.

Proverbs 3:5-6 encourages us to seek the strength found in Christ. While Philippians 4:13 assures us that we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us.

More grace!!

Forgiveness is for us and not someone else. It releases us to walk in freedom. It blocks our pathway from experiencing God’s mercy and grace, ‘Forgive me as I forgive those who trespass against me’ (Matthew 6:14). Forgiveness is a fundamental need for all people. We seek it and sometimes refuse to give it. Forgiveness is about releasing the grip of pain, resentment, or anger that binds us to the past. Whether in personal relationships, communities, or within ourselves, the need for forgiveness arises from our shared imperfection: and we are hurt. Forgiveness is not always easy. It often takes time, courage, and inner work. But it is deeply necessary not just to heal wounds, but to live with open hearts.

Unforgiveness was something i struggled with for a long while. I was attending church and even doing all the ‘churchy’ stuff like, singing on the Praise and Worship Team, teaching Sunday School, smiling and telling myself that i was operating in Love. It was not until one day in prayer, the Holy Spirit brought to my attention that i was operating in unforgiveness and instructed me to deal with it. I prayed about the situation and was even trying to justify why it was necessary for me to hold on to the offense. Eventually, through much tears, fasting and prayer, i was able to leave the incident at the feet of Jesus (1 Peter 5:7). Today, i am free.

Making the decision to walk in forgiveness forces us to do it quickly (Colossians 3:13). It’s a daily choice that believers must make as prescribed in scriptures. It is one of the things that separates us from the world. Throughout the Scriptures, God continues to call us back to him. He tells us to repent from our evil ways and embrace righteousness. His forgiveness is not dependent on what we can do or have done. God is a merciful God whose forgiveness is an outpouring of His love. He doesn’t forgive us reluctantly – He does so abundantly and with joy.

I encourage you today, to forgive those who have wronged you, extend the grace of God which you freely received to someone else who is deemed unworthy. Its not an occasional act but each day through difficult circumstances, as believers we choose to give it to God and remove our emotions from the matter. Its difficult but doable. It didn’t matter the color of your skin or where you hail from , we must all forgive and move steadily in love.

Discipline is the ability to control your impulses, stay focused on your goals (whether long term or short term). It allows for one to make choices in alignment with his values even when it’s uncomfortable or inconvenient. Power is the ability to influence , direct or control outcomes. It is about mastery, responsibility and impact.

The Power of Discipline is one of the most vital forces behind any form of success whether living the christian life or aspiring to achieve greatly. While motivation may light the fire, discipline keeps it burning long after the initial spark fades. The Apostle Paul says in Acts 24:16 that he always disciplines himself in order to have a clear conscience, void of offense towards God and toward men. In his letter to Timothy (2 Timothy 1:7) Paul admonished him that God has not given him the spirit of fear and timidity but of Love, Power and Self-Discipline. Self-Disciple is not just will power, it is the Gift of the Holy Spirit. God empowers us to live with strength, love and control over our actions and desires. In order to achieve anything that’s worthwhile or carry substance and or exercise authority, one must practise self-discipline.

Discipline creates consistency. It creates the path to keep you moving forward even when you don’t feel like it. Discipline builds Self-Respect. Often times we do not fulfill the promises we made to ourselves. However everytime we do what we promised, even in difficult situations, we are reassuring ourselves that we matter and deserves honor and respect. By training oneself to resist distractions, you develop the ability to concentrate on what truly matters. Honoring and respecting self lead to better decisions, less procrastination and more meaningful progress. Each time you follow through on a promise to self, you build self-trust. This boosts your confidence and belief that you can overcome challenges. Proverbs 25:28 tells us that a man without self-discipline is like a city broken into and left without walls. Without discipline, we are vulnerable and open to emotional , spiritual and moral collapse.

As we navigate this life, I encourage us to be disciplined in our pursuit for greatness. Be clear about our goals; break down tasks in smaller workable ones; develop set routines and stick to them; avoid distractions and temptations; track your progress and celebrate the small wins. It’s important to be yielded to the Holy Spirit so that He can guide and direct the decisions we make and the directions we take (Psalm 32:8 – ‘I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with My eye.’)

More Grace.

Kindness is referred to as the quality of being friendly, generous and considerate.

Today, my friend and i had a conversation about the power of kindness within a relationship. We discussed the fact that many couples are not friendly towards each other. Some dont even like each other. Let alone be considerate to each other’s feelings, needs or wants. We concluded our discussion on this very salient point that, one of the most important ingredients in relationships, is kindness. Proverbs 11:17 tells us that those who are kind benefit themselves but the cruel bring ruin on themselves. Its clear here that when you are kind, it opens the doors for you to have a great return. Matthew 5:7 informs us that Blessed are the merciful for they shall inherit the earth. Mercy/kindness is an attribute of Gods Divine nature. He is rich in mercy. Kindness moves us to act on behalf of one who is not deserving. We are guaranteed the possession of the earth ( kindness has benefits).

Kindness is not given only in pleasant situations but also when one is faced with troubled realities and experience mean acts. It has no favorites but is extended as the needs arise. It’s selfless and considerate. It doesn’t always look after itself but is always looking a way to serve. Within our relationships, it’s important to search for ways to serve, instead of focusing on being served. Ephesians 4:32 says, Be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving one another as God in Christ forgave you.

Kindness shows up when punishment should be imputed. Its an investment in our own wellbeing. Its never too late to be kind, polite and a loving human being. We all fall short therefore as we attain knowledge and understanding, it must be offered freely. Lets not wait on the good works of others but rather allow kindness to flow based on its necessity. No act of kindness, no matter how small is ever wasted. Aesop. Colossians 3:12 states Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness and patience.

I charge us, today, to put on kindness and extend it to our neighbor, not because they are showing us that they deserve it but because we know it must be given generously. Remember it has its own reward. The more you sow this seed of kindness, it will grow and we will reap the rich harvest. Let kindness be on your tongue (Proverb 31:26). Couples, do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing.

Should you be struggling with kindness, may i suggest that you ask the Holy Spirit for help. Ask Him to help you become more like Him so that you can be a conduit for kindness. Ask Him to help you to demonstrate His mighty power through you that you can exercise love and kindness to your neighbor and yourself.

More Grace.

The world is so chaotic. Sometimes we are not even able to hear our own selves. We lose touch of who we are and sleepwalk through life. We do not take the time that is needed to centre ourselves on what truly matters. Our minds keep going, not on what fosters growth and maturity but on the cares of life. Some of us, continue to speak and not be intentional enough about being still to hear the inner man or the voice of the Holy Spirit.

One writer says, the world would be happier if men had the same capacity to be silent that they have to speak. Silence is needed for the improvement of mans wellbeing, whether cognitivity and or emotionally. It reduces stress and advance focus. It creates space for creativity and re-centre us on what’s important. Ecclesiastes 3:7 informs us that there is a time to be silent and a time to speak. It is said that a fool is one who talks constantly and at inappropriate times but those who uses wisdom understands when to be silent and when to speak. Proverbs 18:6-7 ‘The lips of fools bring them strife, and their mouths invite a beating. The mouths of fools are their undoing, and their lips are a snare to their very lives.

I believe that in this season, God is calling us to silence. He wants to speak to us but we are too busy speaking. The bible says in Proverbs 10:19 that when there are many words, sin is unavoidable, but the one who controls his lips is prudent. It’s important to know that even our idle words will be taken in account by the ‘Just Judge.’ Silence allows for reflection and comprehension. Silence is significance in the emotional,, psychological, spiritual and social aspects of lives. It has its rightful place in the rhythm of life discernment. Psalm 46:10 tells us to ‘Be still and know that i am God.’ Its in the stillness and silence that we experience the presence of God.

For me, it’s in the moments when i choose to stop talking and allow myself to be silent, that often times i experience God the most. Its in those early morning walks, or sitting on the deck in the late evenings, or even lying down in bed, most times sin the dark, that He shows up. Those are the times you get the writing materials because as you prepare yourself to listen, He will speak.

Should we find our lives being chaotic then it means there is the absence of the Holy Spirit. It may be an indication that you are not listening enough. Silence should afford you clarity. The truth is, you cannot walk in obedience if you are not clear on the instructions. I challenge you today, to find your quiet place where you meet with the Holy Spirit. Prepare your heart and choose to not say anything but to listen to what He has to say. I promise you, that you will leave full. Choose to be silent, give ear to the voice of the Holy Spirit and He will give you deep revelation and insight that you have never experienced before.

More Grace!

Disappointment is inevitable, it is bound to happen or experienced at some point or the other.

Disappointment according to google, is sadness or displeasure caused by the non fulfillment of one’s hopes or expectations.. It comes out of frustration; example of disappointment: you prepare for an interview, did well at it, believed you got the job but was later told you were not shortlisted. OR you gave your time and effort in a relationship, hoping that it would be lasting, however it didn’t work out. Disappointment is shattered hope. The scripture says in 1 Peter 5:7 to cast your cares on Jesus because He cares for you. If as people, we don’t learn the art of bringing all our situations and circumstances to the Lord and believe that out of his love and care for us, He will work them all out for our good. We will find ourselves in a place of sadness, displeasure and broken heartedness.

We experience disappointment differently, some of us it’s that low feeling of sadness deep down in the stomach. For others, it’s a sense of failure, others its regret and still for others it is hopelessness. Disappointment is rooted in hope and beliefs about how a particular thing should be. It’s expecting a specific result from a situation sometimes based on the time and effort exerted. It highlights where you are and what your values and desires are. It compels change and growth and encourages emotional resilience.

Two notable points are: (1) Psalm 34:18 tells us that ‘The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.’ God sees your pain and He’s near. His strength can be reached. (2) Romans 5:3-5 points out that ‘We also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance character and character hope. And hope does not put us to shame.’ Disappointment grows our character, if we let it, and leads us to a deeper hope that is not based only on circumstances.

As we navigate disappointments, the following is necessary:

1. Be clear about how you feel. Own it. Psalm 62:8 – ‘pour out your heart to Him, for God is our refuge.’ God wants us to be authentic. Talk to and with Him honestly about how you feel. Admit how the situation and or circumstance allow you to feel.
2. Find out the cause. Ask yourself if the plan you had, failed. Were my desires met? Was my hope misplaced? I’m i trusting that all things will work together for my good (unanswered prayer). Talk yourself through it.
3. Take it to the Lord. Don’t allow your feelings to pull you away from God.

In concluding, Romans 8:28 tells us that ‘all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose.’ Even our disappointments can be used by God for a greater purpose.

God’s speed.